In this parenting slot of the show, I talk with Kathryn Ryan about saying no to persistent children and teenagers, and have some tips on how to manage those situations.
In this parenting slot of the show, I talk with Kathryn Ryan about saying no to persistent children and teenagers, and have some tips on how to manage those situations.
We are entering an era – if we haven’t already – where patterns of rainfall we have planned for are likely to be disrupted, meaning that we have to think carefully about how we live as new patterns emerge.
Drought for farmers means more than just a bit of dry grass. In the cities, we certainly need to be mindful of our water usage and conservation, but the serious economic, social and emotional effects of drought are often underestimated by city-dwellers. Droughts can be classified as a natural hazard – a fact that is often overlooked.
For those whose livelihoods are disrupted by water shortages, the primary impact tends to be experienced economically. The agricultural industry plays a fundamentally important role in New Zealand’s economy, directly accounting for 4.5 per cent of GDP, with the water-intensive dairy industry making up 48 per cent of gross agricultural production in 2013.
Uncertainty regarding water supply looms large over farmers, not only from a climate change perspective, but also through possible mooted changes to the Resource Management Act. Winter animal feed supplies are being used early, meaning that it is likely to be scarcer and more costly later on. The irrigation season could also shut down weeks earlier than usual, and groundwater levels in some areas are at the lowest level in 30 years.
Couple these with falling global commodity prices, including milk products, and the scenario begins to look very challenging, especially on the back of the last big dry period in 2013. All this strain on the rural agricultural economy may flow through to the urban centres in many ways, perhaps most widely felt through food prices. Power prices may also be affected if hydroelectric production capacity is affected.
Economic loss may also be associated with a higher risk of emotional distress. People may experience heightened or overwhelming anxiety, constant worrying, and trouble with sleeping. Reactions can vary from person to person but these are common responses to disasters like droughts. However, the social and psychological effects of living through drought can be subtler when compared to other hazards, and may be experienced over a different, and potentially longer time cycle. They can affect families and whole communities and towns, with flow on effects throughout the country.
It used to be that droughts were not commonplace, occurring approximately every five years. As these events become more regular, it is likely that we no longer experience them as one-off events. The impact of this is cumulative. Financial implications are likely to be carried forward into the next economic planning cycle and there may be a lag in putting into place the processes to mitigate for future risk. We can then no longer recover from using existing systems and resources available to us.
Voluntary and then mandatory conservation measures were enough to see cities through the droughts of the past. We cannot rely on the model any more. Shifting climatic conditions require a shift from one-off crisis management planning to more sustainable planning for periods of low water availability. and/or higher costs associated with water scarcity such as winter feed or increased power prices. This affects both rural and urban communities, and many communities are uniting to face this challenge. Much more still needs to be done.
More frequent periods of drought with shorter periods of adequate rainfall and competition for water resource such as through population growth, mean that there needs to be renewed efforts to develop ways to effectively manage existing water sources. Urban populations can still be tied up in the notion that water is available in unlimited quantities, and has a low cost. The emphasis on conservation of wasted water may have got cities through the droughts of the past. The demand of the agricultural sector on this precious limited resource may mean increased scrutiny on issues of water management, perhaps setting up a much needed debate on the use of water throughout New Zealand.
All of us have encountered challenging times in our lives, when we feel vulnerable to the strains of daily living. Some of these strains show themselves as a result of big events that happen to us or people we care about, or are merely geographically close to. Some of the strain is the cumulative impact of lots of little events that add up and threaten to push you over your tipping point of coping capacity. Both types of negative events – big and small – can have an effect on our wellbeing.
If you cross this with various cycles in our lives which mean that we are more vulnerable to the impacts of these big and small negative events, it becomes clear that it is really important that we keep an eye out for how well we can withstand these challenges when they arrive. At the time of writing this blog post for example, we are entering week 4 of January – about the time where those new activities designed to sort our lives out made in those New Year’s resolutions are perhaps beginning to be very difficult to maintain. As a result, we can feel guilty, throw the towel in, and revert to old behaviours that we recognised we needed to change.
What do we do when we feel under pressure like this?
There are many strategies that have been put forward to help build our personal resilience and wellbeing. One of the most well-known and widely evidenced is the 5 ways to wellbeing protocol. You can read much more about that, starting here.
Here is another set of 5 practices that differ slightly from those 5 ways, designed to help you to focus on basic self-maintenance, and some reflection on what you want your life to be about.
1. Pay attention to the basics of diet, exercise and sleep. If you sleep badly, don’t eat well, and allow yourself to get into poor physical shape, you become far more vulnerable to low mood. Daily activities can drain away what resources you have to cope and can more quickly get down if you haven’t been looking after yourself well. The sleep you get before midnight seems to be better value that the sleep your get after midnight, so try to get to bed earlier. Watch your alcohol intake: not only are there extra calories in that and cardiovascular and other risks too, it can also affect your sleep quality and duration. Excessive dietary control, as well as excessive consumption, also carries a risk – potentially making you more irritable, tired and weak, and more likely to rebound into original eating habits. Exercise is good, but make sure you build up gently so as to avoid risk of injury.
2. Clarify your values and goals. How do you spend your time? One of the major reasons for low mood is a mismatch between what you really value and what you do. How this shows itself in your life can be hard to pin down, but often it is low mood and general dissatisfaction, perhaps even depression. Thinking about your values can sometimes feel self-indulgent. But it is key to our wellbeing. Write out a personal statement of values and goals – there’s plenty out there to help you, like this. It will help you to figure out whether what you are doing in your work and your personal life is in tune with your values. If you find it is not, then it may help you to work out what sort of changes you may need to make to help you out of the hole you may have found yourself in.
3. Put pleasures into life. One of the perils of modern life is that we see extremes presented to us – by the media for example. We see people who are egotistical and narcissistic in everyday life too – and we steer clear of being identified as being tagged with that label. Sometimes, we oversteer. People can often not value themselves highly enough. We even effectively downgrade ourselves by denying ourselves pleasures. We can tend to put other people’s needs first, and see ourselves at the back of the queue, ‘when we get around to it’. The danger is that we never get around to it. Some parents can be like this. They put their children’s needs so much above their own that they give themselves no personal time and space at all. Even if you don’t think you deserve to enjoy yourself right now, try to make sure you do things you like doing. Putting pleasures into life – not just doing the chores and work because you feel like you don’t have the energy for anything else – is a fundamental plank in building a platform of personal resilience.
4. Do not put all your eggs in one basket. Nothing goes well all the time. Everyone goes trough periods when work, or some part of work, is going badly. Or there are difficulties in close relationships. Or life in general seems to be full of problems. If you place all your sense of self-worth into just one aspect of your life – often this is work, or being a ‘good’ parent – there will be times when we can feel very vulnerable. When you do feel low, think about how much of your sense of self-worth os bound to just one aspect of your life.If your pattern of despondency or low mood suggests too close a connection with just one part of your life, its likely that you have too many eggs in that one basket. To protect yourself from this kind of dependency, its wise to have several parts to your life, work, friends, kids, pets, family, hobbies, inside and outside the home, social and solitary. At any point that one part of your life doesn’t seem to be going well, you can draw comfort and support from other parts.
5. Build up supportive relationships. Having someone to confide in, be it a relative, partner or a friend is one of the most important forms of protection from becoming depressed with something bad happens. If you don’t have a close supportive relationship, if your friends do not provide you with the support you need, then looking at how you can build up this support is one of the more important things you can do. Building up supportive relationships takes time and effort. As an immigrant to New Zealand, from the other side of the planet, I know this only too well. It doesn’t happen overnight, and when it seems difficult it is helpful to remember that it can be done at any stage of life and that there are many steps along the way. Some tips for getting started include:
Note though that a supportive relationship must not be a smothering one – we need our own independence and autonomy as well as support.
When good things happen to us, and when we can focus on practices that improve of self-care, it looks likely that not only do they make us feel better, but they actually result in a boost to our immune system functioning . Keep practicing these 5 strategies, and you will be well on your way to increasing your wellbeing, and that can include better functioning at a basic physiological level too.
For more, check out Manage your Mind by Gillian Butler and Tony Hope.
Another BBC TV World News interview done last Friday (16 January 2015). This interview focused on AirAsia flight #QZ8501 body retrieval challenges for divers and disaster victim identification workers, and the impact on families. As always, BBC are very easy and professional to work with. The interviewer was in London, and the production team called me from Singapore to set up and do the interview while I was in New Zealand on Skype.
There are times in teams and organisations where people disagree. People are sometimes wary of disagreement – even downright fearful. But what if we could harness disagreement in a way that opens up conversations, in ways that enable people to talk about what they see differently. How that might help to do things in different and better ways?
Scaling can help with that. It can help to open up a conversation about what is already helpful and what might be small and do-able next steps. It can even be a really good way of checking in to see if everyone is on the same page, and helps in a process of putting that right if they are not.
Here’s how to do it:
Ask people to rate their current situation on a particular issue. If someone says their current situation is a 7 and another says theirs is a 4, that’s just fine. The person scaling 7 may believe we are closer to perfection than the 4 scorer. Or they might just be more easily impressed. Or an optimist.
It doesn’t matter.
Ask the 7 scorer –
Ask the 4 scorer –
Ask them to compare notes on what each has seen that the other has missed or valued differently.
From the answers you receive, you can enjoy the benefits of multiple perspectives while discovering aspects of each personality that might help in the next steps. Perhaps one team member is more skeptical and enjoys checking claims, and the other’s more optimistic disposition would suit exploratory discussions with a new partner. This is a really good way of testing out and finding appropriate roles for this particular task in the early stages, without the expense or time of a formal team assessment or other intervention
You don’t have to be in a team to get the benefits of scaling either. It’s a good developmental check in solo projects.
Deviance is often framed as a bad, bad thing. It is often defined as intentional behaviour that departs from society’s norms, thereby threatening the well-being of others. So, examples of deviant behaviour can be stealing or antisocial behaviour. But can you be positively deviant? These are intentional behaviours that are deviant from the norm in honourable ways. Yes, yes you can – and the power of positive deviance can unlock a whole host of opportunities.
Positive deviants are people who appear to be finding better solutions to complex and pervasive problems compared to their peers and neighbours despite having access only to the same resources. Their ‘uncommon behaviours’ can then be spread and adopted more widely by the community. And they are uncommon behaviours. Positive deviance is about behaviours that break the constraints of the accepted norm and has profound effects of those people and organisations that foster and encourage those behaviours.
The key aspects of positive deviance seems to be:
Can you nurture your inherent positive deviant? What proportion of your behaviour is honourable and counter to the social norm? You don’t want to be out there on your own all the time, but there is something to be learned when going with the rip, when everyone else is struggling to swim against it.
Our long-term memory system is thought to have an unlimited capacity. Once information goes in, it stays there forever. So, the failure to remember something is not because the information has dropped out of our system. Rather, memory problems often stem from problems with people’s ability to retrieve some of the knowledge that they possess. Long-term memory can be retrieved by giving information good ‘tags’ (e.g. strong verbal and imagery codes), when it is initially encoded, or by searching the tags properly to find it.
Another feature of our long-term memory system is that our emotional state ay the time of learning and at the time of recall affects retention. When the mood a person is in during learning matches the mood he is in when asked to recall, retention is improved. When a sad mood is evoked, people remember more unpleasant past experiences than when a happy mood is engendered. Similarly, people remember more happy childhood experiences when asked to get themselves into a happy mood. This kind of research gives us a clue that part of the memory tag or metadata for the things we learn contains information about our emotional state at the time of learning.
So, we can see that emotional cues may help to facilitate retrieval of memories up to a point. Happy mood – more likely to have happy memories – and if we are grumpy, we are more likely to retrieve negative memories. But extremely strong emotions can interfere with trying to recall information rather than facilitating retrieval. For example, sitting an exam for a test-anxious student isn’t going to help with performance.
The retrieval of memories is a dynamic process – it is more than just flicking through a register of memories and calling it up into consciousness. Recall forces us to reconstruct, reproduce or recreate the original information we encoded from a variety of memory metadata, including our memory at the time we learned the information, and the emotion at the time we are trying to call it. To this extent, what we remember changes.
Next week, I’ll talk about some simple techniques for improving your memory.
“No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better” – Samuel Beckett
If you’re feeling a little fragile and low in self-confidence, one of the traps you can fall into is getting overly into the idea that mistakes matter. Let’s say you tried every day for the next year to try to make a mistake that nobody had ever made before. How’s that going (you’d probably fail – you see the irony I hope)?
It doesn’t matter so much about doing something ‘wrong’ or ‘badly’ – what matters is whether you can recognise the mistake and use it to try to set yourself on a better path next time.
Mistakes are for learning – only those that have ceased to develop never take a mis-step. Mistakes tell us something – they are a source of information. Learn from the error, but don’t dwell on it and the emotions of embarrassment that may come along with it. Try to acknowledge and detach from the feeling, learn from what went wrong, set it aside, and move along. Although it may not feel like it, everyone else will move along too.
The society we live in values acquisition – property, money, skills, knowledge – we should have more and more of everything. We rarely see modes of existence that value ‘being’. So, is it any surprise that we see the acquisitive or ‘having’ mode of living as the norm? This so slanted towards the side of having, that is often really hard to understand just what is meant by ‘being’.
Imagine being involved in a conversation – perhaps you meet someone famous, or well-respected in their field – or someone who can fix you up with a great job opportunity, someone you want to impress – someone you’d like to date maybe. Let’s say that the prospect of meeting this person makes you mildly anxious. Let’s say that you start to prepare for this potential meeting and conversation. You start to think of topics that might interest the other person. Sometimes you might think of a conversation starter – others might even map out the whole conversation in their minds – or at least, their own part in it – plotting out different ways the conversation might go and develop contingencies for all these eventualities.
Another way to bolster yourself is to think about what you have; your past successes, you charming / influential personality, your social position, your connections, your appearance, your snappy dress sense. You mentally go through a process of balancing your worth, and based on this evaluation, you show-off your fancy feathers in the conversation. If you’re good at this, you will indeed impress a lot of people – though a lot will be due to your performance and the ability of other people to judge your authenticity. If you’re not good at it, you might even come across as wooden and a little uninteresting.
What would it be like if you chose not to prepare anything in advance? Instead of bolstering yourself up by thinking about your previous accomplishments that show how cool you are, what if you responded spontaneously? What about if you forgot about yourself, about your knowledge and schooling, and the social position you occupy?
When your own ego – you thinking about all that you have – isn’t standing between you and the other person involved in the conversation, suddenly you are more free to fully respond to the other person and their ideas. You are able to give voice to new ideas because you aren’t busy holding on to old ones. While people in the ‘having’ mode of existence rely on what they have, people in ‘being’ mode rely on the fact that they are – that they are alive to the moment and that something new will come if only they have the courage to let go of having and to respond. Indeed, “They come fully alive in the conversation, because they don’t stifle themselves by anxious concern with what they have” (Fromm, 1978, To Have and To Be, p.42).
Even better, imagine if your own aliveness was infectious and can help the other person transcend their own mode of existence from having into being? Conversation then stops being an exchange of commodities – information, status, knowledge – and becomes a dialogue where something new is created. The conversation becomes more of an enlivening a dance, rather than the drudgery of a military exercise.
I often approach public speaking this way now – less concerned with having and my own anxious concern to demonstrate my worth, but more focused on being and the co-creation of something new rather than broadcasting my supposedly superior knowledge. It really is a very freeing experience.
You have probably had the delightful experience of being stuck in a jam of slow-moving cars that suddenly disappears without revealing any obvious cause for the jam. No crashed cars, no roadworks – what was that about?
These ‘phantom jams’ have been shown to arise by accident. One car suddenly changes lane, causing those behind it to brake sharply. When you have fast-moving lanes of traffic with only short distances between vehicles, that kind of braking sends ripples down the road. Drivers brake harder and harder to prevent themselves from hitting the vehicle in front. Eventually, the traffic towards the back is at a standstill – even though that isn’t what any of the divers wanted to do.
We could trace the jam back to that original driver who changed lane sharply. That would be pointless though, because they are not affected by the braking going on behind them. We might publicly berate people who change lanes sharply. We might lecture drivers so they promise never to change lanes sharply ever again. Would that prevent it from happening again? With millions of drivers on the road, any of whom could do this, this is not possible. And anyway, they might actually need to in some cases, because of approaching junctions, hazards, or some other road user.
What would happen if, instead, we looked at what happens when jams don’t occur. This is when drivers have enough time and space to react to other road users – by braking or maneuvering without forcing the vehicle behind to take evasive action, thus rippling the effect down the road and causing a jam.
This happens when roads are quiet, or when traffic is moving slower and drivers have more time to react. Hence the variable speed limits that are deployed around the world now. The solution is to bring in lower speed limits at busy times – which bizarrely allows more traffic along highways than do higher speed limits and the jams that come along with them.
Greater traffic flow, fewer jams and lower risk of accidents to boot. This solution doesn’t address the cause of the problem – abrupt actions – at all. It simply allows them to happen without undesirable consequences.
Where can you learn from what is working well for you in times of quiet and low speed which you can build in when you are feeling stressed and things are moving too fast? Perhaps slowing things down can actually increase both your productivity and your wellbeing.
In our recently published research, we found that all GPs reported significant increases in workload raising questions about the need for coordination of locum support. GPs often found themselves working outside their area of accustomed expertise especially in relation to patients needing financial aid. GPs identified a number of coping behaviours though some only in hindsight. Greater awareness of self-care strategies would benefit GPs responding to disasters.
As I got off the plane in Christchurch yesterday morning and switched my phone on, it buzzed. The email was a request from a BBC TV World News producer requesting a live interview on uncertainty for families on flight MH370. I was simultaneously excited and anxious. How did this email arrive with me of all people? Was I going to do it? If so – how? I was busy all day and then had a hotel room with limited internet bandwidth.
I thought about it as I drove to my first appointment, and pulled over to send my cellphone number to the producer in London to indicate my acceptance of the invitation to be interviewed, but to talk through what might come up. The producer was very professional and called me back at the suggested time. After talking through the possible lines of questions, I was happy to carry on. The interview would be via skype, and we would test the link 30 mins before going on air. The interview would be live, and would probably run for 3 minutes or so.
As they patched me into the link, I could see my bandwidth being chewed up at a pretty fast rate. I lost the feed at one point, as i had to enter a code to release another chunk of 200MB of data. I got the producer a message that I probably had another 5 minutes of data left at this rate, and they made the decision to move me up the interview chain in seconds – very professional.
The room was dark, and you can’t see my face very well, but here is the result. The background work included some calling back to the office to get a couple of key papers sent to me so I could recap a particular point I needed to make (thank, Tom Huggins), a call to a friend who has worked in comms in disasters who had a particularly good point to make about notifying the possibly bereaved by text message (thanks, Sara McBride), and a call to the Consular Division of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Trade in NZ to get the absolute and up-to-date official line on what assistance was available to the NZ Citizens affected and their families and loved ones (thanks Team MFAT). I’m posting that in case you find yourself in a similar position – the support you get from your team and wider contacts is invaluable.
Here is the result:
With a slight delay, here is a podcast of my slot on Radio New Zealand in November 2013, talking about praising kids. It is about 20 mins in duration – and please ignore the description on the Radio NZ National website – it is from a previous slot I did for them.
I’ll be holding seminar next week in Wellington (24/7/13) about making change., One of the things I will be talking about is habits. Here’s a brief taster of some of the content I will cover.
I’ll talk more about how to break bad habits and create good ones during the workshop, as well as the stages of change that you can expect to go through. You can pretty much apply this to all levels of your life and athletic performance – whether you are a novice or high achiever,
If you are interested in coming along and learning more, do sign up here. I think it will be a fun evening with interesting people to network with too.
I’ve been pondering over the challenge of incentivising a greater proportion and diversity of people volunteering in New Zealand and was reading a story about how the design agency IDEO came up with a tagging system to help Oxfam manage the donations they get into their stores in the UK. They asked regular donors to register and they gave them a bunch of tags which they then attached to their donated items when they dropped them off. Results: less hassle for donors, no waiting to drop things off, and Oxfam have a register of their donors and know what they donated.
What about a volunteer rewards card in New Zealand, more specifically, what about Canterbury? There are lots of people who are willing to help out, and there are lots of projects that could do with a hand. one of the challenges is matching these projects and people. another is encouraging those people who might want to help, by making it easier for them, and giving them the chance to earn a little reward back too.
How about this: people pre-register, and are issued with a rewards card with number and barcode. They register their skills and what they can help with. Project leaders register their needs and the database can be designed to match the two. As an incentive, rewards can be offered per unit of time volunteered successfully on a project. This could be funded either through philanthropic organizations / private sector contribution / or NGO / govt – the right mix can be sorted out.
As a side benefit, students can give permission for their project volunteer record to be released to their school or university as a positive additions to their transcript, documenting their civic activities. Same for people of working age or above. Training they receive (or give) can be documented too. It may end up being a pretty good differentiator in a crowded jobs market (in certain sectors). Even better, this could be a demonstration project for the rest of NZ to roll out over the next 5 years.
Just a germ of an idea, but might be worth kicking around. What do you think?
“Again?!” we say to ourselves in despair, sometimes even out loud. We have all done it. We have caught ourselves making the same mistake yet again. Why, oh why do we find ourselves in the same position again? “Maybe I’m just attracted to the wrong sort”, we say to ourselves. “Maybe I’m just incapable or learning”, we chastise. “Maybe I’m just dumb”, we admonish. Of course, sometimes it isn’t mistakes that we repeat. For example, sometimes we find ourself listening to the same song over and over again, or maybe going through a phase where we like to watch the same movie a few times over a short period of time.
When we find ourselves doing the same thing over and over again in our lives, it can be hard to figure out why. Freud called our constant echoing the repetition compulsion, which he defined as “the desire to return to an earlier state of things.” Frued was very much more interested in the negative things we repeat, which he thought may be linked to something deeply instinctual, which he called “the death drive”, or a drive to no longer exist.
But perhaps there is a different reason. Perhaps we are so used to do things in a certain way, so familiar with certain events, objects and experiences in our lives that we have a developed a pattern over a number of years. Straying from these pattern – no matter whether it is positive or negative – is actually deeply uncomfortable for us because they are so ingrained. These patterns are a little world that we have created for ourselves where events, or encounters with people or objects trigger expectations which we like to see met – even if they are negative because we are so used to them. We discover what works for us and tend to stick with it. In times of stress, anger worry, or other emotional peaks, we repeat what is familiar and what seems safe, in that it meets our expectations. However, this little set-up can trigger a whole host of negative patterns of behaviour, as well as ruminating on thoughts.
Here’s an example. Say you have a problem with insecurity in your relationships. When you don’t get a text or tweet back from your loved one, your mind can wander to negative thoughts like, “I wonder who they are with meaning that they can’t text me back?”, or “If they’re so busy, they don’t prioritise me enough in their life”. These thoughts can well-up and threaten to overwhelm the person and can lead to actions that harm the relationship. Even though the person doesn’t want to react in this way to the non-receipt of a text message or tweet, this pattern of reacting is so ingrained and familiar, that to react in a different, more positive way actually feels alien to them. It feels like it isn’t authentically them at all. When you have been doing something for years, you will continue to carry on doing so, even if you bring on negative consequences by your actions. To do anything else feels even more uncomfortable.
By working on different techniques, people can learn how to recognise when thoughts or actions are more harmful than beneficial, and how to stop them from occurring. Although it can take time, our cognitive processes can be retrained to develop new patterns that are productive and more positive, which ultimately leads to more adaptive behaviors and choices.
It is worth remember that it takes years for people to develop unhelpful patterns, habits, and repetitive choices, and it may also take years to reshape them into something else that might be more positive.
What can you do?
The latest release of the Canterbury Wellbeing Index provides a snapshot picture across the many dimensions affecting social recovery.
It has been said that there is no health without mental health. Indeed, we need to aim even higher than this. For us to flourish throughout our lives and to positively influence and support others we need to be able to thrive and flourish ourselves. Intervening early and in low-key ways can help to prevent more extensive and expensive interventions later in recovery trajectories. So far in the Canterbury Recovery, this seems to be working well at a population level, but the data suggests that a clear and significant minority continues to struggle with everyday life.
For a significant minority of residents, the higher levels of reported stress have permeated throughout everyday life. For many, this has meant an additional stressor in dealing with their frightened, upset of unsettled children. In an unhappy coincidence of conditions, children may also see their parents struggling to cope with their changed lives. This may change how they see their parent’s capacity to cope. Often, these subtle changes may add up over an extended time to produce changed life trajectories.
The range of supports for people experiencing social and psychological difficulties in adjusting to their changed circumstances appears to be going a long way towards meeting current identified needs. This includes, the 0800 helpline, counselling services, the Earthquake Support Coordination Service, extended GP consultations and Canterbury DHB services, as well as a range of supports available through non-government sources such as New Zealand Red Cross. However, there remains the possibility that there are a significant number of people who are struggling who we do not know about, or those who find it challenging to ask for help. As we move through the recovery we will need to keep a careful watch over people’s needs and the resources they may need to meet them. The CWI is a useful tool in helping us to do that.
From this CWI social recovery data release, it seems likely that we are in the midst of a critical period. While some people in the region are able to cope, and indeed are doing well, other require more support. It is important to stress that feeling like you need help is not a sign of weakness; coming forward for help often takes strength and courage.
This support could to help them to cope with the impacts of secondary stressors such as housing quality and availability, insurance transactions, and rebuilding administration and practical arrangements. More broadly, systemic interventions to tackle some of the root causes of these secondary stressors would go a long way towards reducing the extent of their community impacts. There may also be room to extend or refine how support services are able to help those who have delayed coming forward for assistance until recently, or who are continuing to struggle on their own.
Choices exerted by individuals and the communities they are part of, and the degree to which they are expressed, heard and acted upon become even more crucial as the recovery progresses. This empowerment is a multidimensional social process by which individuals and groups gain better understanding and influence over their own lives. As a result, they are able to regain a sense of control over their own social environment to improve their wellbeing and life circumstances. A lack of agency and power could hinder this key component of recovery.
In situations like the Canterbury recovery, the temptation is to think of resilience as the degree to which communities and individuals can adapt and change. The reality is far more complex than this. As well as adaptive capacity, absorptive coping capacity seems important too. This is the degree to which individuals and households can employ strategies to help them keep going in the face of shocks on their livelihoods and basic needs. It is this persistence, and holding on to traditions and valued ways of life that perhaps underpins people’s marked pride in their ability to cope under difficult circumstances. It also perhaps suggests that challenges to changing from well-tried ways of doing things may well be fiercely resisted.
Recent research seems to suggest that mindfulness practice can alter your perception of time. The investigators were investigating the hypothesis that the moment-to-moment awareness that is encouraged by mindfulness meditation practice would have the subjective effect of slowing down time , such that short periods of time seemed longer. And that was exactly what they found.
The researchers used a temporal bisection task, which allows researchers to gauge where each individual subjectively splits a period of time in half. Participants’ responses to this task were collected twice, once before and then again after a listening task. By separating participants into two groups, respondents listened for ten minutes to either an audiobook or a meditation exercise designed to focus their attention on the movement of breath in the body. The results showed that the control group (audiobook) didn’t change in their responses after the listening task compared with before. However, mindfulness meditation led to a relative overestimation of durations i.e. time periods felt longer than they had before.
One interesting feature of this study was that the participants received very little training or experience of mindfulness meditation – just 10 minutes, as opposed to months or years of training. This suggests that the internal clock modulation found in this study is relatively sensitive to short meditative states, and does not require a large degree of training to access it. That seems pretty remarkable to me, and the effects could be leveraged into treatments for difficulties that may distort the effects of time, such as addictions, memory, and emotional regulation.
Those of you who know me will confirm that I am a pretty techy kind of person, and this extends to my running activities. For a while now, I have trained using a heart rate monitor and have used that effectively more in my training runs than actual events. However, I normally wear the HR monitor watch during events as information.
Yesterday, was the Wellington marathon / half-marathon, 10k and 5k event. After a week of big storms and freezing rain in the region, we were lucky and were left with a cold morning, but it was dry and only a moderate wind was blowing. Even then you could only really feel it at the more exposed points of the course. I am still recovering from the concussion I sustained about 10 weeks ago, and I had only run a handful of times since then – the longest run being a 6km treadmill effort. So signing up for this half-marathon event two weeks ago as a real marker to myself to step up my efforts in my recovery plan. The other challenge was that we have had a lot of family health challenges this winter, and although the least affected by these I felt pretty lousy when I went to bed the night before the half-marathon.
When I signed up, I decided that I was not going to wear a watch. Partly, this was so that I didn’t fret about how fast I was going during the event. I wanted to make sure that I wasn’t pushing myself too hard. But partly this was an experiment on how well I could judge my pace without looking at my watch. I hadn’t been too bad at this in the past, as I calibrated my movement pattern and learned what pace was appropriate at different times.
I knew I probably wasn’t sub-2 hours fit, but I was aiming for between 2 hours and 2 hours 10, and finished in 2 hours 2 mins and 57 seconds. So yes, a successful experiment. But the most interesting thing was where how I took my cues, from my internal and external environment. For the first 8kms or so, my mind was tempting me with the thought that I could run sub-2 hours if I really wanted to, and it was tricky to resist the pull to go faster. I was feeling comfortable, and sounding comfortable compared to people blowing out their breath in the cold air all around me. I hung back. By the time I got to the turnaround point at 10.5km, my mind had settled that actually, it was proving a little tougher than I thought and that I should perhaps just try to lock in what I had. Again, amazing what your mind says to you during different stages of an endurance event.
I also had external cues to orient from. I could see the 2 hour pace running group running towards me in the other lane at the turnaround point – so I knew I was behind them, but not by much. And on my way back, I saw the 2 hours 10 pace running group a wee way behind me so I knew I had a start on them. And of course, there is the to-ing and fro-ing with people running a similar pace to you as you get ahead of each other, and overtake each other as you go through water stops and toilet stops. The trick is to stick to your own race and not get drawn into other people’s or mini-duels (though sometimes that is fun for a while). Indeed, I have run events with nothing more in mind than to either talk to people as I go around, or to find people to duel with as I run. Whatever your goal is, stick with it. Of course, you can have sub-goals, but it gets more complicated. Switching goals can get you into trouble.
I liked running without the watch. There is a certain freedom in that But it is amazing how the mind’s desire to constantly compare can find things to triangulate your performance. Beware if your inner voice is admonishing or tempts you to stray from your goal. Some prepared, kind, gentle self-talk can help keep you focused on the goals you set before the event began.
When you try to make a change, say stepping up your training to meet a big new challenge, or perhaps making some new diet choices, there are five stages that you will probably go through. If you’re thinking about coming to this workshop, you’re probably NOT in the precontemplation stage. You’ve already made the decision that something needs to change. But you’re also figuring out what to do – maybe how you might get some help to make that change. Sometimes that seems tough and you get trapped in the thinking rather than the doing. Or perhaps you started doing, and got derailed.You might now be a little ambivalent about making the change – “maybe I’ll just carry on as you are for a while – I can go for the next training cycle …”. You’re certainly not in denial, but maybe you need some help to figure some things out, to get a little boost.
If this sounds like you, this workshop may be just what you are looking for. We will talk about the five stages of change, but we will focus on Contemplation, ACTION, Maintenance, and how to get over lapses. The underlying theme here is support, and the type of support you might need differs as you progress through the stages of change. This workshop will help you to start to unlock the mysteries of what might be most helpful for you, and most crucially, when.
It’s great to announce that I am joining the Wellington-based Health Fit Collective as a coaching psychologist, specialising in optimising health, fitness and sports performance. Shortly, I’ll be posting details of my first group session in July – do come back soon.
It seems that researchers have identified a fundamental sleep mechanism that enables our brains to consolidate emotional memory. (Also, see here for the press release). During the course of the research, the investigators found that sleep spindles – bursts of activity that last for a second or less in specific stages of our sleep cycle – seem to be important for emotional memory. This is new: we already knew that sleep spindles were involved with information we recall about the world, things like people, places and events. However, the focus on emotional memory and sleep has previously been focused on the role of REM, or rapid eye movement sleep.
However, there is a cautionary note to this research. In the process of trying to partition the effects of sleep spindles and REM sleep on the recall of emotional memories, the researchers gave zolpidem, sodium oxybate and a placebo to 28 men and women who were normal sleepers. The study participants viewed images known to elicit positive and negative responses for one second before and after taking supervised naps. They recalled more images that had negative or highly arousing content after taking zolpidem. This suggests that the brain favoured the consolidation of negative memories. In fact, one of the researchers ventured that, “… sleep drugs might be improving memories for things they don’t want to remember.”
My concern for situations where people are anxious is that sleeping aids that may be prescribed may actually cause them to remember more negative memories than if they were not taking that medication. In circumstances where sleeping pill prescriptions have increased substantially, e.g. post-earthquake Christchurch, this doesn’t look like an outcome we should be aiming for. Granted, zolpidem isn’t quite the same as zopiclone – which I believe is the most widely prescribed sleeping pill in New Zealand – but this still raises alarm bells for me. I think I would agree with the investigators that it would be worthwhile investigating whether the administration of benzodiazapine-like drugs might increase the retention of arousing and negative memories. Many in Christchurch are taking this type of medication precisely to get relief from highly stressful life circumstances. It may be that they are unwittingly increasing the chances that they recall negative memories throughout their days as a result of taking this medication.
I loved being involved in this project for young school children – thanks to the team that helped this to happen back in April 2013.
Often, when we are faced with a challenge like completing a project, we can tend to focus on what isn’t there to meet the challenge – deficits in the plan, shortcomings in the membership of the team, weaknesses in skill sets, or lack of cooperation with others. Spending time focusing on what isn’t there isn’t usually a very helpful way to start a task, complete a task or instigate change.
Minimising weakness isn’t development. It’s damage control. However, many organisations fall into the trap of taking their employee’s strengths for granted and focus on minimising their weaknesses. Indeed, many people apply this to their personal lives too. This risk management way of living is very common. People become expert in spotting the areas in which their employees struggle (or perhaps family members), and delicately rename them ‘areas of opportunity’, or ‘things you need to work on’. Of they are packed to training classes, so these weaknesses can be fixed. Of course, this is necessary sometimes – perhaps a communication course might be helpful for a team member who is clearly smart but has difficulty in articulating ideas. But as a general strategy for like and management, it doesn’t tend to work too well.
The challenge is to work with what we have. What we have is probably relevant. If we can stay with the attitude that everything is a useful gift, then perhaps we start to see ways of getting value from anything that circumstances have to offer.
Milton Erickson had some interesting things to say about what he called utilization – using whatever his clients brought. This included all aspects of that person’s environment resources, strengths, abilities or disabilities, relationships, attitudes, problems, symptoms, vocations, hobbies … the list is endless. But he concept remains simple: if it’s part of the patient’s life, it may be useful in reaching the therapeutic end goal. If the patient brings it in, it’s probably more potent than anything the therapist can introduce to the situation.
This utilization principle is probably something we can apply in other contexts too. Move away from a damage control mindset. Don’t just examine under a microscope when mistakes are made – learn when they aren’t made too – and seek to make that happy circumstance happen again.
I was talking with a young lecturer colleague yesterday over a drink, and she was telling us about how rewarding she found it when a student asked her a question she didn’t know the answer to. She used it as an opportunity to go and find the answer, instead of getting defensive and avoidant.
“My students can smell bullshit a mile off, so I couldn’t give an avoiding answer, even if I wanted to.”
She is relatively new in her professional career, yet she had already sussed out one important lesson. If you don’t know, it’s probably best to front up and say so and explore the question. In fact, if you can use it as an opportunity to learn from a naive position, and perhaps reveal the intention behind the question (e.g. the student wants to know how to apply the knowledge in a particular context), everyone wins. You look like a tolerant and open person who is willing to be guided by your students or colleagues on your blind spots, and your students / colleagues feel valued and heard and may actually get some personalised learning out of it too. As Shunryu Suzuki said, “In the mind of the expert, there are few possibilities. In the mind of the beginner there are many.”
More broadly speaking, sometimes when we come to a situation of thinking that we know all there is to know, then we may already risking missing some vital elements of what might make this situation different. Although you might be an expert in a technical field or as a manager, when you aim to communicate or create change in a complex environment it is in your interests to adopt a ‘beginner mind’ and open up to additional possibilities. Sometimes, to see the most possibilities for change in a certain situation, it may actually help to know little or nothing about the field concerned. As John Ziman has observed, “It is well known that major scientific progress often comes from scientists who have crossed conventional disciplinary boundaries, and have no more authority than a layman in an unfamiliar field”.
Challenge yourself to build up your ideas from scratch for each assignment. Respond to this case, not last week’s. The solution this time if probably a bit different, and will stem from what you discover from starting afresh.
It has been a while since I last posted, but I have been recovering and recuperating. I ran the 60km Tarawera Ultramarathon on 16 March. I completed my mission, but not without some trouble.
The 60km course was very hilly and pretty technical in places – lots of roots, rocks and clambering – so this kept my speed down. I also thought I had completely messed up my nutrition and hydration strategy and hit the wall at about 37km, and the dizziness and generally feeling rubbish lasted until about 48km – more on this later. I fell 3 times: (1) Smacked my head on an overhanging branch so hard it knocked me clean off my feet and I saw stars for a few seconds. We started the race in darkness so I had to have my cap on backwards for my running light. Once I turned my cap the other way around about 2 hours later, it obscured my vision, but I had quite noticed that yet. Until I smacked my head. Lesson learned; (2) a spectacular tumble which flying downhill which resulted in a lot of blood caked on the left side of my face which I wasn’t entirely aware of. Must have been disturbing for people; (3) As I was making my way along a narrow section of track with a steep drop off in the period she I was feeling pretty crap, I planted my foot and the ground gave way. As I fell down the side of the track, I managed to grab a rock and hold on. The drop was quite far. It probably wouldn’t have hurt too badly, but it would have hurt. Another runner was passing at the time, and helped haul me up. He looked kind of freaked out. That’s when I found out about the blood on my face.
I completed in 9.5 hours. About an hour and a half over what I wanted to do it in. But it looked like everyone had a hard time, so I’m ok with something of an adventure. Longest race I’ve ever done.
However, once I ‘d finished the race, I started noticing a few things over the following days. The day after the race, I noticed that I was having trouble remembering people’s names – even kind people who I spent quite a lot of time with – which is unlike me. Unfortunately, weather-related issues meant I had to stay an extra night in Rotorua, and I flew straight back to work about 48 hours after completing the race. When I started talking to people, I noticed a few things going on, the most disturbing of which was slurring. To cut a long-story short, it’s been a rough few weeks. I ended up at ED twice with investigations for a possible stroke and / or further subdural haematoma a few weeks later. I was then also under investigation for glandular fever. As it turns out, I probably had / have a concussion and am recovering from that as well as a simultaneous bacterial and viral infection – though it doesn’t appear to have been glandular fever.
So what have I learned?
And finally, that it is taking me a long time to recover. The headaches have reduced in frequency a little (though I actually have a humdinger now), but the fatigue persists. Please bear with me as I get back up to speed – but I also need to heed my advice.
You know what happens, right? You have a coffee in the morning at home – maybe another when you get to work. If it’s another kind of day, maybe one on the way to work too. Before you know it, you’re heading into your first meeting and , sure, I’ll have a coffee. Then, you notice that you’re feeling a bit twitchy, perhaps your foot is tapping or you have this free-floating sense that all is not quite right. And your tummy isn’t feeling too great either. You might have taken in a bit too much caffeine a bit too quickly. It can happen.
So, if you ask a barista, what do they think you should do to bring you down from your over-caffeinated high? Well, water will help to flush some of that caffeine a bit quicker, and eating too seems to help, as well as going for a walk. But the interesting thing was that the recommendation to eat a banana also came up a few times. Coconut water was also suggested. Both bananas and coconut water are rich in potassium. Whether the diuretic effect of caffeine increases the need for potassium, or if it just messes up your electrolyte balance and firing across synapses is not really known. But it is interesting that helping your potassium levels back up through eating something as cheap and as readily available as a banana seems to help.
Give it a try – you’ve got very little to lose. Except that attractive twitch you’ve got going on.
We know that 7-8 hours of sleep per night tends to lead to better health overall, at least at a population level. We also know that the way you sleep (and how much) is linked to overeating, but is it possible that healthy diets can keep you up at night? Does a causal link exist in both directions?
A recently published research study looking at the USA National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) in 2007-2008 involving 4,548 people looked at how much sleep the participants reported getting each night, as well as a very detailed report of their daily diet. For the purposes of this study, very short sleep patterns were defined as less than five hours a night, short sleep was five to six hours a night, standard sleep was 7 to 8 hours, and long sleep was nine or more hours a night. Their analyses revealed that people in the different sleep categories also had different diet patterns. Short sleepers (5-6 hours) seemed to take in the most calories, followed by normal sleepers (7-8 hours), and then very short sleepers (<5 hours). Long sleepers (9+ hours) tended to consume least calories of all. However, normal sleepers seemed to report the greatest variety in their diets, with very short sleepers reporting the least variation in what they ate. This is important because a varied diet tends to be a marker for good health since it includes multiple sources of nutrients.
In more detailed analyses looking and both macro and micro nutrients, very short sleepers reported drinking less tap water and consumed fewer total carbohydrates and lycopene than people with other sleep patterns. Lycopene is found in red and orange-colored fruits and vegetables and is high in cancer-fighting antioxidants. Short sleepers tended to take in less vitamin C, tap water and had lower selenium consumption, but more lutein or zeaxanthin, (which are found in green, leafy vegetables). Long sleep was associated with consuming less theobromine, which is found in chocolate and tea, the saturated fat dodecanoic acid, choline found in eggs and fatty meats and total carbohydrates. Long sleepers also drank more booze.
What do all the correlations mean? The first thing to note is that they are not proof of a causal link. In fact, the study probably raises more questions than it answers – which is a good thing, in my view. Previous research has suggested that sleep deprivation interferes with hunger and satiety hormones crucial to regulating appetite. But the study authors raise the possibility that the relationship works both ways, and that diet can alter possibly sleep as well. Some of the interactions are well-known already, such as how drinking too much water and interrupt sleep by waking you up to use the bathroom, or how consuming heavy and spicy foods can keep you up, but there may be less apparent effects as well. Slightly odd that more alcohol is associated with longer sleep though. I wonder what the quality of that sleep was like?